It feels like time has just flown by since we got engaged and now, suddenly, it’s only 125 days – less than 5 months – until I marry the love of my life and become Mrs Perrins. I feel like I haven’t been able to capture very well on this blog how glittery and exciting and amazing it has all been, because I’ve just been so busy – so wrapped up in it, really – that I haven’t had the chance, and I wanted to just quickly update you – and, okay, my future self – on how I feel right now and what’s been going on.
OK so number one, the biggest thing – I suddenly decided that actually I DO want to get married in a church. We were at another wedding and I was watching the bride walk down the aisle towards the vicar, and we sung the hymns and it dawned on me how much it all meant and how badly I wanted it. And so, without much fuss, we’ve rearranged our wedding from a civil ceremony to a church ceremony in my local church, St Mary’s (thank god, literally, we hadn’t ordered the invites yet!) And that lead onto…
Tea with the Vicar
We were late so we didn’t actually get any tea, but it was fun anyway, sitting there with this man I’m going to agree to be with for the rest of my life, being told off by a vicar because we don’t go to church enough. The upshot of the meeting was that we have to go to church twice a month from now until the wedding, and that we are also going to be very poor.
My parents have kindly agreed to buy my shoes as my birthday present, which would be fine, if I could find a pair I liked that fit! My brain says ‘comfortable, low heel, simple and elegant,’ my heart says ‘six inch sexy heels from Kurt Geiger.’ (Can I wear these to my wedding?)
Nobody has won yet, but the boxes of ‘nope, not quite right’ online purchases are piled on my bedroom floor…suggestions welcome!
My Hen Do
Is all organised, by my sister…I know it’s in the UK and that I need to get on a train at 4.15pm – I know literally nothing else! I’m so excited and just incredibly grateful to her for rounding up the troops and sorting it all out. PLUS she’s told me to bring a bikini…intriguing!
I’m not sure if this happens to every bride, but I’m no longer obsessed by just my own wedding – I’m obsessed by everybody else’s. We went to a wedding in Dorset recently and now all I can think about is the next one we’re going to (in York, in June). I talk about weddings literally all the time – I’m a woman possessed.
All I Want Is Everything
Things I have decided I want in the last few weeks (other than the aforementioned church) include: a photo booth, a videographer, a sweets table, large illuminated lights spelling out ‘LOVE’ (thanks pearlsandpoodles), balloons, mini suitcases to put the table plan in, and a whole brass band…okay, not the last one, but seriously. It’s so hard not to get carried away, especially because I read blogs and magazines and just get all these IDEAS.
And yet sometimes, in the middle of the night, when I’m staring at the ceiling thinking about what kind of suit my Dad should wear or whether the flower lady REALLY UNDERSTOOD the difference between dusky and baby pink – sometimes I’ll stop and look at this human sleeping next to me, this strange, separate person to whom I am going to promise the rest of my life, a warm, living, breathing thing, and the enormity of it fades into a certainty like nothing I have ever known. That at the end of our wedding day I might have blistered feet from stupid shoes and the flowers might clash with the bridesmaid dresses but I will be married to Ian Perrins, this silly, thoughtful, smart, scatter brained, always-late love of mine, and I will be the happiest girl in the world. I think the trick of this, really, is holding onto that.